this post doesn't do our disneyworld experience justice

in may, josh and i celebrated our tenth anniversary by going to disneyworld. we surprised the kids THE DAY OF and it was pretty much the best moment ever.  i was so completely excited i had butterflies in my stomach for days before we told them. 

 

we did two days at magic kingdom and it was the best.  everything was wonderful and magical.  i may have shed a tear or two on our first (and my favorite) ride, peter pan (duh), and during the fireworks i was definitely choking back the tears.  IT WAS JUST THE BEST!

 

 

 

but then, surprise!  we bought four day passes so we were able to come back at the end of may.  so, we were able to surprise the kids with the first two days, and then we were able to tell them we were going back! 

our second trip we did our first day at animal kingdom.  it was AMAZING. i cannot say enough good things about it.  it was beautiful and shady and magical and awesome.  i cried on the safari, i cried during the finding nemo live musical stage show, i cried during the lion king celebration show... oh man, it was all just so glorious.  one of our favorite moments was being all together on the water raft ride... even sawyer.  it was SO much fun.  and then the next day we finished our adventures off at magic kingdom where i cried during the opening song and dance number before they open the park in the morning.  it cannot be helped.  it's just the magic of disney.

macy had a birthday! and a party!

...way to go macy!  and me! even though i throw parties reluctantly (i don't know why) this was a really great party, and i was reminded how fun friend parties are.

macy wanted a circus party.  so naturally, i searched pinterest.  DO NOT DO THIS!!!  i repeat, DO NOT DO THIS!!!!  it was so overwhelming i found myself hyperventilating and feeling the anxiety tighten in my chest.  so, i texted my go-to girl and she talked me down.  phew.  thanks, aubry. pinterest-induced crisis averted.

also, an hour-long conversation with my mom helped.  i was sending the evites (evites!  i know!) and i had to make sure everything was just perfect.  "is this the right wording?" and "is this the right length of time for the party?"  and "can i get away without serving lunch?"  who knew clicking "send" on an evite could be so stressful.  anyway, thanks mom. 

after all my stressing and lost sleep (over what, really? i don't know) the party was great.  it was the perfect day for an outdoor party.  i reserved a pavilion at a park and we played games, ate food (yes, my mom talked me into feeding the children), had cake, and opened presents.  what else do you need?  certainly not pinterest.  in the end, the circus theme was a little lost but guess what... IT DIDN'T MATTER! (mostly i'm yelling that to remind myself.)

macy is wonderful.  she is sweet, she is kind, she is thoughtful, she is loving.  she is the first to say "i love you" and "thanks mom for making dinner".  i couldn't ask for a better seven-year-old.  i just love that girl so much.

the cake... oh, the cake!
disclaimer: i did see this cake on pinterest.
also, aubry talked me through it.

my brother, scott designed the favor graphic. he's so handy.

"out of all my daughters, you are my favorite"

it happened again today.  the urge to say something that sounds exactly like my dad.  i was making oliver lunch and i could hear myself ask him in my head "so oliver... what do you think?"  i didn't say it aloud... he was playing with his cars and absorbed in his car world.  and besides, it probably would have just induced the eye-rolling that the same question from my dad always got out of me as a kid.

"so robin, what do you think?"

(eye roll) "about what, daaaaad?"

"oh i don't know?  life?"

"oh daaaaad..." (another eye roll)

this is not the first time i have witnessed myself transforming into my dad in a small way.  every time i close my eyes and conduct music with my fork while eating (air conducting, my dad is known for it), or anytime i say "poop and tinkle" (my dad's two most favorite words IN THE WORLD), or anytime i blurt out the year a song was released ("1993!  i was a freshman!"), i am channeling my dad.  these are all things that at some point drove me crazy, but now i do them freely.

my dad has had a tough year health-wise.  it started with a heart attack in may, followed by some not-fun complications and symptoms, and most recent, a prostate cancer diagnosis.  (but he's okay! he's gonna be fine!)  but still.  cancer.  radiation.  these are words i never want to associate with anyone i love.

so, next time i find "so ollie, what do you think?" at the tip of my tongue, i'm going to say it proudly.  i'm going to wave that papa dave flag boldly.  even when the eyes start rolling and the "ohhhh  moms" are inescapable i will continue the legacy and react by saying, "poop and tinkle", just like my dad.

and that's a good thing to be.

surfer girl my little surfer girl

when i was in the sixth grade, i fell in love with a red, puffy, 100% silk jacket at express.  oh my goodness i had never loved anything as much as i loved that jacket.  i was obsessed.  it cost $100 and i was determined, DETERMINED to own it.  so, i saved all my babysitting money (was i babysitting when i was eleven?) and i was able to buy that jacket.  i brought it home, protected in its plastic garment bag, convinced my life was complete.  it was the best thing that had ever happened to me.  when i wasn't wearing it, i would hang it on its special express hanger in its special express bag, protecting its delicate silk.

anyway, one day in seventh grade, some lame girl spilled a soda all over it.  this is the only time i can remember crying at school.  it was devastating.  the jacket was never quite the same. i had to have it cleaned and its red color was not quite as bright and it lost a lot of its silky smoothness.

there is no point to this story. i've just been thinking about that red jacket and wondering how in the world i had $100 when i was eleven...

i wish i had a picture of that jacket.
but this picture of me in seventh grade will have to do.

when i was at byu-idaho i saw a boy wearing a hollister t-shirt.  (this was probably 2001, so i had never seen this now-ubiquitous brand.)  i got all excited and walked up to him and proclaimed, "hollister!  do you know hollister?!!!"  (hollister is a little town not far from salinas, where i grew up.)  he just looked at me condescendingly and said, "it's a california thing. you wouldn't understand."  EXCUSE ME?!!!!  NO SIR, YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND!!!  what a jerk. he was probably one of those guys who lived up on the hill in shelbourne.

recently i realized that i have not exposed my kids to nearly enough beach boys.  the beach boys are the soundtrack to my childhood so i figured i better get on that.  so, i bought a few favorite songs and i'm set to remedy my mistake.  next up, more exposure to john denver and frank sinatra. then they'll be all set.

last week the kids and i went through ALL their toys and bagged up about 80% of it.  no joke. it was the BEST feeling.  as i was putting it all in the car, our neighbor's gardener asked if we were moving!  it was that much stuff!  i'm telling you, i wasn't messing around!  i drove it all to the goodwill and as i was unloading the car i amassed a crowd of spectators that said things to me like, "it looks like SOMEONE'S kids have grown up" and "wow, SOMEONE cleaned house!"  i was laughing on the outside, but crying (slightly) on the inside.  it did represent a certain phase of their childhood being over and that sentimentality was not lost on me.  but those feelings were outweighed by the joy of the purge.

old picture of a previous purge.  but you get the idea.
i love to purge.

congratulate me, i blogged!  also, what's your favorite beach boys song?

his nickname is "grumps"

sawyer had a birthday! he was sick and barfing and took a really long nap, but now he's three!  he is very sweet and a bit of a curmudgeon... a perfect combination.  and he's talking so much now!!! and he plays with cars all day!!!

looking back: 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6.

papa jim

on december 13th, my grandfather passed away.  it had been expected, even longed for, as he had grown more and more uncomfortable in his failing body.

papa was definitely a grandpa of actions.  every time i was near him, he would reach over and rub my back.  always.  as children, when we would visit their house in arizona, he would always borrow a  golf cart from a neighbor because he knew what a thrill we got out of riding around in it.  he would have bikes ready for us equipped with headlights for nightly bike rides. he would have the pool ready with a basketball hoop and pool toys.  he would barbecue the most delicious burgers and make us homemade ice cream.  when i was a teenager, he would sit in his car with me before i drove somewhere to show me where all the buttons and controls were because he knew i was unfamiliar with his car.  once when i was in college, i drove down to arizona with a bunch of friends for a cake concert, and when we arrived he had maps printed out for us to the concert hall and posters on the wall that said, "where's the cake?"  in 2006 when i was pregnant with macy, nana and papa moved to california to live with my parents.  for two years we had the opportunity of living near them and for parker and macy to create a bond with them that is very special.  i have a clear memory of when macy was born and papa weeping over seeing her for the first time.  he cried very easily, but it was still such a sweet moment.  he was a wonderful great-grandfather.

last weekend i went to california for his military burial and memorial service.  i loved having that time to be with my family and to reflect on his life and what he meant to me.  i am grateful for having such a wonderful grandpa... he was the best.

the unblogged

THESE THINGS HAPPENED:

halloween, christmas, oliver's birthday (five!), and josh's birthday (34!).

also, i resolve to blog more.  i picture the long-forgotten, abandoned-for-instagram blog rising from the dust to be glorious again in this new year!!!